Tuesday, August 4, 2009

♥ RIP Ricky ♥

Well, this is going to be the most emo and saddest post for me so far. I had just lost someone that I love so much. Well, though its not a human, but I love him so much. Yeah, A 100% dog lover just lost her best friend.

I blame myself badly. He’s ill, very ill. And the idiot me, can’t help anything. I hate the moment I saw him so suffering and yet I can’t do anything. What I did was just keep crying whole day. No one would understand my feeling, unless you loss yours just like mine. I hate the way he died. You wouldn’t wanna know how. I couldn’t forgive myself. No, I can’t. I’m not a good owner.

Daddy planned to get a new doggie when he knew ricky is going to leave us. Of course, I opposed it badly. What will he thinks if I get another dog? Don’t tell me dog doesn’t have feeling. I treat him more than just animal okay? He’s with me since I was 9 years old!!! Irreplacable!!!

Still remember the night daddy brought him home. I was awake when I heard him making some noise in the box. Yeah we placed him in a box as we haven’t get him a ‘home’ yet. This little 9-year-YOUNG girl went to search over the fridge to get him some foods but find nothing. Ended up, I woke daddy up to fill Ricky’s stomach. I still remember clearly, how cute and small he was when I first met him. ^^

Hate the feel of losing. Tears keep dripping. And I keep skipping classes. A friend called me but what his response was: just a dog. Wth. I know it’s just a dog. But does that mean I can’t cry over a dog that has been with me for so long and I even treat him as one part of my family? I’m sensitive alright? So just shoo!!!

Regret. Yeah im regret. I lost all of his photos. Fcuk the hardisk that gone for burton. A few days before he left, I wanted to take some photos with him. He peeped at me from his ‘house’ when I called him and this is the first time he didn’t come near me when I called. I was sad. He knows I wanted to take photo with him but…… Sigh~

Scenes of him keep appearing in my mind when I’m writing this. The way he jumps happily when he saw me. The way he passes his hand to me when I said: hand-hand. The reluctant look of him when daddy wants to bath him. The moment I gave him some foods from my plate and get complain from mummy. His favourites which are roti canai and bat kut teh…… And also, his blood stain on the floor which broke my heart.

My bad habit that have to get rid. I used to call his name once I get back home. Yeah I did sometimes after his loss. And now, I used to call his name in my heart. Haha I sound like a girl who just broke up. Whatever, I really miss my Ricky.

I better stop before I get more emo. Rip, ricky. You’ll always in my heart. Love you!!!


L1nG L1nG said...




Be strong, Casley. I am always here, if you need a listener.

Wee said...

jieeeee! =)
anything can find me ya =)
long time din chat le =(